Why aren’t parents making Wills?

There are a lot of situations where people lose their lives but are survived by their children as minors, yet I think the whole issue of planning for guardianship is just too painful to think about, so it gets deferred or not even contemplated. This element of will-making is rarely raised yet it is far more important than property and chattels really.

It is probable that a significant proportion of parents are put off by their fear of the costs of making a will. In fact the process, even if employing a solicitor, is not particularly expensive and neither is it difficult, although it does require some serious thinking and resolution. But people might not see it as an economical and straightforward process; as an expenditure priority it ranks lower than holidays, entertainment, pets, phones, television, and computers. Objective education and guidance needs to be available to people – not the smarmy adverts from the legal profession and the para-legals.

I don’t know who should be taking parents to one side and asking them, in the interests of their children, whether they have thought about future responsibility for the children in the event of the parents’ untimely death and the advantages of making a will. Some grandparents might feel up to it. Perhaps other family members could broach it. But it’s a pretty untouchable subject I should think in many cases. Some might say that doctors’ surgeries should put up an informative poster and have some leaflets available. Has it ever been raised in soap operas or popular dramas? I should be interested to read how Ann thinks the message can be put across effectively. I’ve been a Which? subscriber for fifty years but I never knew it had a ‘wills team’ and now I am curious to know what it does and what has been its contribution to encouraging people to recognise the importance of having a will and doing something about it. There are good causes and charities for just about every circumstance and condition these days but I wonder if there is one dedicated to helping people to make a will, both with practical advice and support and also to relieve the costs of having a will drawn up professionally.

Having dealt with a few estates in my time, both with wills and without, I can truly vouch for the fact that the existence of a valid will makes the settlement of all the deceased’s affairs so much easier, and is much more beneficial for any dependants, and that the absence of a will can make the whole process incredibly fraught with all manner of speculations, interpretations, misunderstandings, and disharmony within the family. The beauty of a will is that it is conclusive, brooks no argument, and generally settles things clearly, and for the future welfare of children those are valuable attributes that, in my view, it is morally indefensible, and possibly irresponsible and negligent, to deny them.

I am not surprised at the attitude of fathers compared to mothers’ greater willingness to do something; if the father funks it then the mother will probably not wish to struggle with it on her own. Men – it’s time to do your duty: put your children’s interests first.

With Mothers Day coming up [and Fathers Day a few months later] it’s a good time to put this issue on the national agenda.

I haven’t made a will yet. I don’t feel any pressure to make one because, from what I understand of the intestacy rules, they would result in my estate being distributed exactly how I would want it to be distributed anyway.

I very strongly urge anyone who owns property or has significant assets to make a will. The complications that can ensue, with horrendous legal costs, can be unimaginable. Clint and others please don’t assume you know or understand the consequences of dying intestate.
A neighbour of ours died a few years ago, unfortunately their spouse died two days later. There was no will and no dispute amongst the three beneficiaries but it took 3 years to settle probate. With solicitors costs at around £250 per hour the legal fees must have taken a huge percentage of the estate.
In another case I know of the will was badly written, the property was left jointly between the beneficiaries with the surviving spouse able to live in the house until death. There is also a sitting tenant in part of the property. The beneficiaries cannot agree what to do with the property when the spouse dies. One of them has had a severe stroke and may not be able to make a coherent decision.
Whatever service you use, do make a will. Our choice was to take advice from solicitors and pay to have the wills prepared: the cost may seem significant but when weighed against potential costs they are small.