Why isn’t elderly care at home meeting basic needs?

I’ve just had the first month review with social services re my mother’s home care package. I was apalled to find she’s got ready for bed at 6pm, so is sitting in her nightie and dressing gown (plus blankets) until bedtime. At the moment she is able to get to bed herself, but if she wasn’t I’m sure she’d be put to bed at 6pm.

It seems that people’s care is currently arranged to convenience the care provider, not the person. However, I can also see that to do the latter we’d probably need more care workers employed for shorter and more unsocial hours than they are now. How many people would be prepared to do that?

I am just getting involved with this as my father has recently lost his wife of 35 years has just passed away and he has Parkinson’s and it is terrifying. I have tried to have him with me but as I work full time and cover about a thousand miles a week, it just doesn’t work. I cannot afford not to work and we all earn too much to get any benefits but it is the lack of help and advice that is worse. The Social Services where he lives are useless, they don’t have a Parkinson’s nurse and the local NHS trust is a local joke. We are looking at wardened accommodation currently but a care home is likely to follow before too long and that is the real worry with the current bout of reports and financial failings. When will the fools in Westminster realise that we all end up old and most will need help to some extent, and sort out the whole business? My father has always paid tax and NI as have I and now we need some payback, it’s not there. It is a shameful state of affairs and we are fast declining into 3rd world status because of poor management.

We are at the stage where we are helping care for several elderly relatives on both sides of the family. My mother has had care since a serious illness 15 years ago, and it is clear how the package of care has decreased over that time-initially, the socialisation, cleaning and shopping was an important part of the care package. Usually, the same carer came three times a week, and built up a friendly, but professional relationship with my mother. Last year, my mother entered a care home. This was precipitated by a change in the care arrangements so that my mother was expected to cope with an allocation of vouchers which she used to ‘buy’ her care. This type of choice was way beyond my mother’s reasoning ability. She has since been in two care homes, which she finances herself. The first was a large busy home, which suited her, but the carers were young, often agency workers. To her credit, she coped with the indignity of being washed by young men the same age as her grandsons. She is now in a smaller home, where the physical care is excellent, but the atmosphere less stimulating.
Another relative had 15 minute daily visits to check on medication and any personal needs. This relative’s dementia was fairly benign, and she seemed to cope, although again when the authority changed agency provision, new relationships needed to be built, and understanding of the manifestation of the condition.
We are now trying to help another relative, who so far, has organised her own help or through Age UK. She is dreading the thought of another Winter on her own, and would like to enter a care home, but being in reasonable health, her finances do not allow this to be a viable option at present.
Whilst we have not experienced any of the horrific stories that are being published, I have realised that care in the home is not a viable option when there is almost 100% dependency for basic needs. Even if personal finances allowed, who would be willing to take on such a job? Shouldn’t a rich society be expecting that care homes were strictly regulated, with standards expected which promote elderly peoples’ feelings of security, happiness, and as much well-being as possible?

General Question

Has anyone had any help or assistance form either Help the Aged or Age Concern ??

Over the years I have been following various strands of conversations at WHICH? on care of the elderly most of whch has been concentrated on services supplied by the Private Sector and to say the least the coresspondance has been of a wide and varied nature.
Is this suprising I ask myself when you are dealing with such a complex matter, surely when one looks at the size and the service it is not suprising that one gets numerous and varying reports which reflect the numerous and varying people involved.There are no guidelines from WHICH? that can be used and in fact to expect the views of 4 out of work actors to reflect the views of thousands of elderly people who at , in most cases at the end of their lives is totally nieave