Do novelties get the better of us?

You could leave one to see if it pupates and emerges as a butterfly bun.

It’s nothing short of larval abuse, I tell you…

Connie, a pet form of Constance, seems appropriate for a bride. But are we really not in the realms of fantasy here? Perhaps we should have a national poll and see how many would choose Mr and Mrs CakeyMcCakeFace.

Ever since D H Lawrence wrote about Lady Chatterley and her fling with the gamekeeper, the name Constance has been out of favour. Good of M&S to bring it back into circulation, but they missed a trick by not calling the other one Clifford [Connie’s husband].

The £100 price is here: http://www.marksandspencer.com/MSFindItemsByKeyword?searchTerm=colin+the+caterpillar+wedding+cake&langId=-24&storeId=10151&catalogId=10051&categoryId=0&typeAhead=

Whether it represents decent value depends on how small the portions are and whether a sponge filling covered in milk chocolate and a few decorative flourishes is your idea of a nice wedding cake. Connie the Bride and Colin the Groom each weigh in at over 2 kilos and serves 40 guests; the actual combined weight is 4200 g so each portion is therefore 52.5 g at an average price of £1.25. Given the irregular reticulated forms of the caterpillars it will be difficult to cut equal portions and I doubt many will manage to get 40 slices out of each cake so an extra one or two might be a good idea – especially if there are children at the wedding breakfast. Colin has a chocolate buttercream filling and Connie has a strawberry-flavoured buttercream filling. The matrimonial caterpillars are not available for collection until 23 February but can be ordered in advance.

Honestly . . . the things we have to worry about these days!

Thanks for the link wavechange. These each cost £50 and each serve 40 people – the intro could be construed as saying the pair serve 40. Personally I don’t see why you wouldn’t buy the cheaper birthday version and decorate it yourself. Unless you are an expert in sexing confectionery caterpillars you’ll get away with a single Colin, if you only have 40 guests. Then shop online for some pink and blue butterflies to show your transition from the immature state. http://www.cakecraftworld.co.uk/shop/909/7/571/

Some couples may, of course, only want a male caterpillar, others only a female for example so the M&S £50 ones seem to be getting to grips with modern life. Will we soon see a trans-gender caterpillar cake?

I can see that a sponge cake is fine for a birthday or other party but I thought that wedding cakes were normally heavy fruit cakes and the happy couple retained a tier to enjoy later. Maybe I’m just out of date.

Cup cake tiers became a fashion. Just like everything else, people these days are more unrestrained and less willing to abide by “convention”. I prefer a light cake to fruit, but I think one reason for fruit, apart from its exotic and costly heritage, is that the bottom tier was reserved as a christening cake for the first child, and therefore had to last….and last in some cases. These days, as children often precede marriage, that need no longer be a need for many, and a childish caterpillar cake may well be the appropriate choice that not only the guests, but particularly the offspring, can enjoy at the reception.

Thanks for the explanation, Malcolm. Having an arrangement of cup cakes obviously removes the need for someone to undertake the task of cutting neat pieces of fruit cake during the event. Maybe we could hide a few pieces of fruit cake behind the iced sponge cake for the benefit of the old school, much in the same way that we cater for vegetarians.

We were staying at a hotel once when there was a “Wedding Show” on so we had a look around. I would say that conventional practices and accoutrements are not only still going strong but are being embellished to make them even more appealing. There is a certain American-style pretentiousness about the furnishing and decoration of the reception these days but otherwise I think tradition still counts for a lot in attire, customs, and even the catering and cakes. It’s still the mother of the bride’s big day so convention prevails.

That’s lovely Lauren. On an issue of such national import, so much controversy could have been avoided. I have tears in my eyes. My one comment would that this would be a rather sterile marriage as caterpillars cannot themselves reproduce. This seems sad. Should M&S not put matters right by producing huge butterfly buns – names now required, apparently. I’d start by suggesting Apollo ( Parnassius apollo) and Cleopatra ( Gonepteryx cleopatra)

@mtrain, well done Melanie. Will the press office be issuing a press release to avoid further public confusion? It would be nice to change the picture. I wonder, given the extraordinary publicity, how many brides’ mums will now be persuaded to buy the creepy caterpillars? M&S shares anyone?

There was a Winnie the Pooh birthday cake in M&S the other day. It must be quite a traumatic experience for a young child to see their parent amputate and dissect their favourite character before the eyes of themselves and their young friends. Why don’t we have cakes in the image of Adolf Hitler or Attila the Hun?

Other hate figures are available.

Couldn’t bear it.